| Let us go, through certain half-deserted streets |
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[24 Sep 2007|11:52pm] |
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So I'm back on this thing and I need people to read because if I know (or just think) that people are actually reading what I write, then I will write more, which is a healthy thing for me to do. So contribute to my health and join the discussion. Please go to http://thisisthatscene.blogspot.com and subscribe, and maybe even comment on some stuff. Thanks!
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| Week of Peace |
[23 Sep 2007|10:54pm] |
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Knights - Minus the Bear |
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So a lot has happened this week. I've been really busy and incredibly tired. In fact, I didn't go to church today just so I could sleep in, but nevertheless, things are good. My classes are great, illuminating and never tiresome. My friends are pretty much just incredible. And God never ceases to amaze me.
On Sunday, Mike W. and I went to Imago Dei, which was great and nice because we hadn't been to church in a while. He liked it a lot so I think we are going to make an effort to go each week. That night a few of us went to Sabbath, which is just like an hour of worship and a short devotional each week. The worship band that played was the one with a bunch of my friends and also my personal favorite, music-wise. It was a great night.
On Monday I went to chapel and we had a guest speaker and a guest worship leader. They were both incredible, the speaker talked all week about the Shema. I had originally contemplated getting a tat of ahava (love) in the context of the Shema, but Dave, the speaker was talking about he we often think of "love" as the important phrase in the Shema (Love the Lord your God...Love your neighbor as yourself), but he said that it's really "with all," because that is the part that is emphasized and repeated. All week it was amazing. And then Isa, the worship leader was incredible. I bought all of her cd's. She was the perfect example of talent being used to praise God through music. Then at QV a few people who went to India talked about what that was like. We also talked about our efforts to spread the Gospel bring our culture in as well and what impact that has on the nation we are trying to reach. It was really a good discussion. Are we making the Gospel into a Western/American thing? Then we decided that since it was International Day of Peace/International Prayer for Peace Day on Friday, we were going to do something special for Gathering (Friday morning worship).
On Thursday morning I went to class and during Seminar, we talked more about Bonaventure and when it came my turn to lecture I felt like in those minutes I started learning even more in trying to explain the material. I just have to say that it is the most exciting thing to have come to a conclusion on your own and then much later down the line have it affirmed by amazing writing from centuries prior.
Then that night, Philosophy Club put on a "grand opening" of sorts at the Community Garden. I had been drafted the week before to be in charge of grilling, so I went over at 5 and just grilled vegetables on 4 grills until 8 pm. All the food we had was from the garden, right down to the fresh squeezed grape juice and the pies and watermelon. It was so much fun. And then Corey's wife had made pesto so we have vegetable wraps with pesto. Amazing. Then I went to the James Project Committee meeting and after that went over to the House to talk to Sydney and Heidi about Gathering the next morning.
So on Friday we had the band playing and then I did a liturgy for peace, then we showed a slideshow with pictures and quotes about peace and then had Sydney, Chris, Allie, and Linnea read some old
then Linnea had gotten hemp and white beads to make prayer bracelets and because of some miscommunication and not having enough material, we had a bunch of extra time in the middle that would have been awkward, but ended up being just 10 minutes of prayer and music. It really was an amazing time. God was at work.
Then on Friday night, Mike W. and I went to see Mute Math and Eisley. It was great. And then I walk in and who do I see but Brian and Sarah Dixen and Jeff Valder! It was so much fun. So we hung out and ended up getting some food and whatnot after the show. It was tons of fun seeing them.
Just being there surrounded by AMAZING music, tons of people who loved it as much as I did and a BUNCH of friends from school and even random friends from back home. It was great.
Then on Saturday I went to James Project at 8 am and it ended up jsut being Chris N., and Alex and I. We picked up/delivered furniture donations for Love INC to people who needed it around Newberg. It was really cool. And Alex and I went and got a UHAUL and went to pick up a donation from this lady who was moving. She lived in a REALLY nice condo and had this REALLY nice brand new furniture that she was giving away. Well, we brought it back and as soon as we unloaded it, a guy came by to pick up some stuff. Well like, the things that he needed were a dining room table, couch, tv, dresser, and desk. It just happened that those were the things we had just brought back. It turns out that he and his family had been living in a motorhome by the river like a month prior until it set on fire and they lost everything. They are now living in an apartment and he has a job and is trying to find a church and stuff. It was really amazing and had kind of an impact. I dont really know what else to say about it.
Then I got back and Derek, Mike W. and I went to the outlet mall at Woodburn and I got a new bookbag from GAP for $16, jeans from Aeropostale for $25, and a pair of green Chuck T's at the Converse store for $19. It was a great day. Then we went bowling with the girls and it was a lot of fun. The end.
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| Schooooolllll |
[10 Sep 2007|09:57am] |
so far school is great. our house rules. but we have had some problems with one roommate, John, and he is the only one who was just placed randomly with us. it's not really working out. he's weird and annoying and clingy, but also rude and inconsiderate of our privacy and our things. he flakes out when it comes to paying things like cable, furniture (both of which he was a huge proponent of getting), and our food. we went to Costco and bought a bunch of food and each person was to pitch in $20 to cover it and so far everyone has done so but John. It would be one thing if he didn't want the food, then I would be fine with him not paying, but in one night he drank 6 bottles of water. He says he has no money to spend, but he bought a PS2 for $200 and keeps telling us about his huge wishlist on Amazon.com. Then last night he ordered 2 pizzas and breadsticks for $20 and had ONE SLICE of it. Finally last night we confronted him on it. He ended up starting to cry and went to his room. I sort of felt bad, but really I'm just sick and tired of sliding over to accommodate his insensitivity to the rest of the house. He freaked out yesterday when Mike and Jack got a pizza fro Papa Murphy's and he comes in and goes "you guys got a pizza and didn't tell me?!" We were like "of course we did, why would we tell you?" You know? We wouldn't have let him have any. Then we went to Fred Meyer yesterday, and as we're leaving he comes to the front porch and (he's on his phone) is looking at us like "Guys! Where are you going? Why didn't you tell me?!" That just pissed me off because we are having to start sneaking out of the house and whispering in OUR HOUSE to avoid him. He will go and spend money st Fred Meyer. No. It's not happening anymore. UGH!
however, apart from John, or "Ninja" as he likes to be called, things are AWESOME. I am so happy that we all get to live together. Wednesday was serve day and our house went and helped Habitat For Humanity. It was fun. Then on Friday, Mike W., Jack, Derek, Ben and I went to the beach, and barbecued burgers and all that jazz. The beach is amazing. The sunset and the waves are amazing.
Then Saturday night was the Main Event, where all the living areas split up into big teams and compete to see who's the best. It's awesome. Houses won last year so we were defending. But this year we came in second to the apartments. It was awesome though. We were the black team and I wore all spandex. It was great. We were a badass team. We even tried to steal the trophy from the apartments, but I was like the only who who jumped up to grab it. We didn't get it.
Then last night we watched "Say Anything" because it was OnDemand, and Mike and Ben and I had started it the night before. We had been itching all day to watch it, and after a TON of football and some COPS, we watched it. That movie is so good. I love it. Diane Court is the woman of my dreams.
Indeed. I love this place.
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[22 Aug 2007|01:38am] |
So obviously I'm leaving for school soon. Friday morning, actually. I am very excited to go back. But that's not what this is about.
First, a story that I forgot to tell you, but now it's too late. But in like the first of my job at the theater, I was working concessions, and someone had a really big order and one thing they wanted was Reeses Pieces. And like I often do when someone has a big order, for my sake, I repeat it all back to them to make sure they or I didn't forget anything. So I came to the like 3 bags of Reeses Pieces and somehow the words "Reeses Penis" came out. It just did. So I tried to save it all, but as the creature of habit I am, I had to keep going until I got it right, and I tried and tried and ended up saying Reeses Penis to this customer at least 3 times. Eventually I just mumbled all my words so it sounded like I was thinking out loud to myself and made this counting motion with my hands, like I was deep in thought. Needless to say, I avoided eye contact with the customer at all costs.
Then tonight I found a bunch of Scandinavian folk songs online. They are all ripped from vinyl albums (lots of crackling...it is so cool) and from 1963-1970. I love love love love it. So much. And one of the singers is named Carl-Erik Thørn.
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[03 Aug 2007|11:33am] |
So yesterday I was tearing tickets while Mike, the main ticket taker, was on break. Then another coworker, Cameron, who I've worked with only once, comes up to me and punches my shoulder like we've known each other for years and years. So first a little background... This guy is weird....like total weirdo....30-something years old....He used to work at Regal, and although we're not supposed to hire people who have worked for Regal, this guy, while working there, spent his ENTIRE PAYCHECK every month at our theater...yeah....He was working like 2 jobs and spent his ENTIRE PAYCHECK at our theater... So we eventually hired him. And he magically finds people's cell numbers and asks them if they want to go see a movie with him...Weird...
Well anyway, he comes up to me after getting out of the employee screening of The Bourne Ultimatum at like 7:30 and comes up to me like we're old friends or something, and it was like this:
Cameron: "I just got out of the screening for Bourne and...shit man...it was incredible...."
Me: Really? Sweet...I've been waiting for it...
Cam: So have you seen the first two?
Me: Oh yeah, I love them. So cool...
Cam: Oh gosh then you are going to LOVE this one....It was so incredible...you will have a total nerdgasm.
Me: *awkward chuckle*
So he told me I would have a nerdgasm....
So I laughed about it and finished the night, but the midnight showing was not selling out at all... So I got off at 10:30, although I was scheduled till midnight, and my dad OBVIOUSLY wanted to see it, but I didn't think he'd want to see it at midnight, but he asked if we could go...So I called in and amazingly they we're like "yeah that's fine!"
So my dad and I went and saw The Bourne Ultimatum. Well it WAS incredible. Oh my gosh...Maybe my favorite of the 3, but thats hard because I love all of them. Bottom line though, not really sure what nergasm means, but it was a great movie.
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[02 Aug 2007|10:36am] |
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So what does Homecoming 2008 include? Yeah, thats right, Five O'Clock People, back together again, playing a concert. I'm totally stoked.
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[03 Jul 2007|03:49pm] |
so, i just got back from camp. it was really good this year. different from past years, but good. for instance i didn't have that really cool emotional spiritual high that most people get at camp, but that was alright. i just became certain about some things. and then the last day was the only day that actually felt like camp, but it was great...just hanging out with new people etc.
this week i counseled, led worship at the evening services each night, AND was in charge of the thursday night enterttainment program for Sonburst. It was a really busy/stressful week, but it was nice to be involved in so much. I only had free time friday and saturday afternoon, other than that i was filming/editing all afternoon from sunday to thursday. we made some reallllllllly good movies though. it was 'tons of fun for everyone...." BUT WAIT! Thats not all! By some miraculous crazy planning, I ended up with the same cabin of boys I had last year (much to my chagrin, at first). They we so crazy. A LOT to handle. But somehow we actually had successful cabin time this year and God really seemed to be moving in them. At first I was mad that I had the same cabin, becuase normally they dont do that. But now I see that God was really letting me be a part of something that I though extremely improbably - spiritual formation in all of these crazy 8th graders.
lots more happened that I cant really think of right now, but it was great.
then on sunday I went to the Erickson's cabin on Camano with Pete. That was fun.
Then I came home and opened up a letter from GFU. It was my financial aid award letter that I had been waiting for for a while, and I was also freaking out about it because of my procrastination, and I wasnt sure If i would get much or anything at all to help pay for school. Well people, God provides and the school awarded me over $24,000. Its just a confirmation that God DOES want me at GFU. Its really amazing.
PSALM 107
Then I went and saw Knocked Up with Alan and Stacia FOR FREEEEEEE! It was fun. I thought it was a good movie. And because of a big misunderstanding between managers, I am not working until Friday, which is nice actually, because i have the 4th off.
ANyway, LOST tonight. Totally stoked. And then the 4th on Camano tomorrow! Yesssss.
OH!!!!
go to
http://www.thechurchoffice.net
you can watch all of the Church Office season 2, all written by Jason and I, and directed and edited by yours truly.
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[20 Jun 2007|01:21am] |
So today I was hired at the Alderwood 16 movie theater. Training starts Friday! I am really excited about it!
P.S. Welcome home, Katie!!!
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[11 Jun 2007|11:40pm] |
God's pretty cool.
I had a good weekend. I ended up going on the Beckler River camping trip with the youth group for the first time in like 2 or 3 years. It was fun. The leader to student ratio was crazy though because so many people bailed at the last minutes, haha. There were 16 people and only 7 of them were youth kids. It was really fun though.
I realized that I sort of feel like I wasted my highschool years and now try my best to live vicariously through the youth kids. Saturday night I told them all about the rules I've broken this year at school and the awesome and awful pranks I pulled. I also played airsoft with everyone for the first time ever this weekend. It was really fun. Also, everyone seemed to have Nintendo DS and so we were all chatting with playing Mafia and playing Mario Kart together.
So, Sunday night, after church, Alan and I were hanging out and I went to Fred Meyer, bought a Nintendo DS and Pokemon Pearl. Yes, seriously.
Then today I had an interview at Safeway. It went REALLY well and the hiring manager said that she would hire me right on the spot but her manager wanted her to conduct all the interviews first. I should know tomorrow afternoon.
But then whats even more awesome is that a few hours later I got a call from a little hardware store that I applied at a few weeks ago wanting me to come in for an interview. Then like an hour later the theater called wanting an interview with me this week. So I have more interviews. I guess today is the day. It's cool. God is good. He really is. I guess sometimes he just wants to remind us of it.
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| Weekend... |
[06 Mar 2007|12:15am] |
So, best weekend EVER....
Well it started out REALLY CRAPPY because I was going to go home, but realized I couldnt because of work... so that was a major bummer...
BUT THEN (here is where the dark clouds part in my story)....
The NCAA Division III regional championship was being hosted here at Fox for womens basketball... So it was us, U. of Puget Sound, Gustavus Adolphus College in Minnesota, and some school from Texas.... UPS beat the Texas school and we beat Gustavus Adolphus, and it was just GRAND.... like eight 3 pointers in the first 5 minutes of the game... GREAT.
<soundsreallygay><rambling>
So we devised a cunning plan to look up the coach at UPS's home phone, call it, and get her cell phone number, call that, pretend to be parents of one of the players and find out which hotel they were staying at.... then we were going to streak through it and whatever...
We got the phone numbers, but didnt have the guts to go over and pull the fire alarm and streak... so we didnt.
The next day was the big showdown between us and UPS. Whoever won was going to advance to the Sweet 16, and play somewhere exotic, like Texas...
But we lost....
BUT THEN, all the RA's in Coffin Hall were gone on a retreat. So like 4 of us, Ryan (our RAR), myself, Mike, and Scotty, came up with this brilliant plan....PARTY and a SLIP 'N SLIDE....in the hallway.
We bought a huge roll of plastic sheeting at Home Depot and at like 11:30, after floor hours, we went to work. We laid down the plastic on the floor of our hall, for like 50-60 ft. We taped it to the walls and stuff, too, and man, it was professional. It looked great. And then we strung my christmas lights on the ceiling and turned out the other lights.
Then in the bathroom we cleaned it really nicely and locked the stalls and made signs to use the lobby bathroom. Then we moved a few couches into the bathroom. Then we put Saran wrap in the sinks and put chips, and ice with cans of pop in them, and then we MADE PUNCH and put the punch in two of the sinks... Then we had mood lights and music going in the bathroom. It was so badass, you have no idea.
We also went all over town looking for dry ice to no avail.
Then we made some calls and invited a few people over.
At 12, people started showing up. All of a sudden there were over 40 people there. The word had totally spread...
And the funniest part is that, apart from Josiah and Gabe, all the people who showed up were girls (RULE VIOLATIONS! OVER 40 OF THEM!).
So we slipped and slid for a while, smashed into the wall and got bruised and just got the crap beat out of us. Everyone was just in awe of our ability to throw a party like we did. And like half of the basketball team was their, we considered it our way of saying "thanks for a great season..." hahah.
So then at like 1:30, a security guard shows up and is like "there was a noise complaint..."
And the whole time, people are just being loud and cheering others on... then the security guard started walking down the hall and people were just like booking it, running out of windows and the back door, like we were at a kegger that got busted by the cops...
I think that overall, the security guard, regardless of the myriad rules we broke, was mainly impressed with us. He was like "uh, what's that?" and Ryan says, very matter-of-factly, "oh, that's a slip 'n slide."
So then we cleaned everything up and there was NOT A TRACE of anything that went on that night. The soap and water in the carpet dried out and everything.
Then the next morning at breakfast, Scotty and Jack were at breakfast with B.B. and some of the other girls on the b-ball team that were at the party, and they were talking about it. Then some Senior goes "oh, that was your floor?!"
Then tonight, I was talking to a junior, and she was like "wait, you live in Coffin, right? were you guys the slip n slide floor?"
Haha. YES. WE WERE.
So basically the word has once again spread like wildfire. We are cool.
</rambling></soundsreallygay>
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| Lent |
[21 Feb 2007|03:40pm] |
So I've been thinking about Lent a bit lately and I know you're not really supposed to talk a bunch about your fast (whatever you give up), but I'm going to tell you a bit anyway.
In the past I have always done something like give up pop and obviously that has worked out fine and I have felt really amazing after I've done it. However a lot of the time, I think that the "well this is a band habit" aspect is what drives us to give up _____ during Lent. However, Lent is really a season of darkness, of examination. It is also a season of repentance and preparation for what is to come. It is sackcloth and ashes. It is hunger and anticipation of death. We are awaiting the greatest death and suffering, but also, we are preparing ourselves for what is to be achieved through that death-life. It is season of the spiritual. A season of drawing near to God in a time of distance.
If that's what Lent is, what good does giving up pop do for me, other than the fact that it is healthy?
So this year I have decided that my fast is time.
Each day, I am giving up 2:30-3:00pm to writing. This is in addition to any normal devotional time I manage to spend during the week. So for the next roughly 40+ days I will be writing and expounding upon scripture and my own ideas for a half hour.
Also, I'm going to try to make it over to the Trappist monastery some time and maybe spend some evenings at compline or something.
So that's what I'm doing. I hope that we all kind of think about Lent and what it means and what we can do to get the most out of it.
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| this is that scene indeed, |
[29 Jan 2007|01:25am] |
So I'm pretty sure I'm like psychotic and borderline schitzo and manic depressive. Yeah. Well, not really of course, but I seem to have these irrational beliefs that people are avoiding me or really can't stand me. And I think to an extent, in one situation in particular, this is true. However, when I find myself thinking these things I have to stop and say "Stop it, Carl-Eric. No one is out to get you." This is reassuring, but of course if I am indeed crazy it doesn't make things better. Today I was talking to someone about some of this drama going on with a few people and I told them how I think sometimes. They said "haha, of course you're not crazy." Well thanks, "____," that means people are avoiding me. But of course if they had told me that I must be crazy to think that, well of course that is not good because it would mean that I am crazy. I don't like the idea of being crazy. I really don't like crazy people. I think it's stupid when people see you look in their general direction and laugh and think, that for some stupid reason, you were laughing at them. Am I crazy? No, I don't think so, I'm just sick of some of the people here. I thought I was through with f-ing high school. Gosh, when will people grow up? I apologize in advance to my sister whom I love so much, but I am sick and tired of people who feed on other people's emotions and create all this daytime drama shit.
In other news, I talked to my mom today and that was good. I told her a bit of what was going on. She said that she thought that I was more compassionate than I let on or that she gave me credit for. This was the best thing I could ever hear. I guess I'm doing something right. For a year and a half I've just been thinking about everything that has happened to me since September 2005 and how I've changed. I can say words about how I think and feel and what I believe, but what is it worth if I don't act on it? Sometimes I feel like Quiz Kid Donnie Smith from Magnolia.
Does anyone every notice that I'm trying to love? If they're not, am I doing what I should be in order to let them know? Do I want people to know that I care about them and love them as a point of pride or out of humility and my duty as a human being?
I know I may not show it at home or always around my friends. I'm not entirely certain why. I think it has something to do with the fact that it's really tough. Maybe I don't want to let down my guard or anything... I think I have a bunch of shields and defense mechanisms that hide who I am. I'm sorry if I have every acted in a particular fashion toward you and you found it hurtful. I didn't mean any harm... at least not in the past two years or so.
Also, I am standing in front of a sort of creative block. I can't seem to write, think clearly, or create anything. I have been in what I like to call the "napkin stage" for far too long. This is where you have a bunch of snippets - ideas - just scattered randomly around, either in the mind or on paper and you know that you want to fit them all together and say something with them but you cant figure out what and how. This is a glorious time which I embrace fully, however there comes a time where you say eureka! and make those fragments a real work. Maybe this is why I adore mosaics and collages so much. I love how you can take so many things, seemingly unrelated, and put them together and form something beautiful. The frayed edges on the shards of old newspaper don't matter. They even seem beautiful when placed beneath an National Geographic photo of a Masai warrior. I am aware that few of you will understand what I am talking about, but Sonja, keep making collages...they promote my deep thinking.
Isn't this what God sort of does with us? He takes old scraps of paper, shards of glass, a bunch of ideas, seemingly random and unrelated, and puts them together to form a beautiful work of art. There is this one collage in particular that my sister made that I believe is now in the posession of one of my friends that gives me this great feeling of satisfaction. I think it is so beautiful. I want it. I wish it were mine. It is amazing, yet it is a collage of imperfect, random shapes and colors. However, when I look at it I think it get a glimpse of what God feels like when he looks at me, and this feeling is catastrophic to the everyday; the mundane grayscale so many of us seem to be living in.
So I was on some mp3 blogs today and read the news of Andrew Bird's upcoming album, Armchair Apocrypha, due out March 30th. I listened to some of it and felt a bit of excitement and sort of contempt for the fact that I don't have the resources and people I need to do exactly what I want. I am a demanding artist and I'm ok with that. Just like Rembrandt wouldn't have tried to paint "The Return of the Prodigal Son" with watercolor paints and God wouldn't have tried to make me without the right dust and breath, I don't really want to make something beautiful without the right materials, guaranteeing that it match my grand vision for it. It's like wrestling match inside of me. I will only be satisfied with the right people and resources, but I dont have them...however I must keep working. ANd then I show someone what I have and try to explain to them my vision for it - what it is supposed to be - and they can't envision it, or they envision it differently.
This what I call heartbreak.
I think it's how God felt after the Fall. His artwork went back to a sort of primitive state. It wasn't fully actualized. It got up and defied his own vision for masterpiece. It wanted to go somewhere else. I can hear God right now saying to me "No, this isn't what it is supposed to look like! I meant for it to have higher contrast. Bold colors! I don't like pastels."
"Carl-Eric, you were meant to have violins...beautiful, grandiose violins and cellos. I wanted them to come in quietly at the 3:52 mark. More reverb!"
I'm sorry if you don't relate to this. I mean, I really hope you do, but I apologize if you don't. But this to me is heartbreak in its purest, most isolated form.
So as the book says, I await the day when the Artist returns to "make all things new" (Revelation 21:4).
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| SNOWWW |
[16 Jan 2007|04:37pm] |
I know all of you at home and up north won't really be phased by this, but for ME it is all to special to disregard.
This morning I woke up to joyful hollering outside my window. "What is this commotion," I wondered, "it's 7:45 am!" But I pulled back the curtain and my sleepy eyes tried to adjust to the abnormally high level of light outside. They focused and I saw it...snow on the ground. First off, snow wasn't even in the forecast, and even if it was it would be nothing more than wishful thinking. "It never snows in Newberg," they say. So realizing it wasn't a dream, and that I still had a half hour until I needed to get out of bed, my heart jumped. I grabbed my computer to check my email and the school page for closure info...nothing.
But with a tiny smile on my face, I closed my eyes and pulled the down comforter around my neck.
I could not, however, sleep, but I was okay with this. The day was already amazing, and I wasn't even tired. So I just got up, showered, and made it to the Bon just in time to grab a cinnamon roll and a glass of orange juice on my way to Sociology. Class was good, but only because I didn't pay attention. I watched the large snowflakes drift to the ground at an incredible rate. Next, Communication. I sat in my chair, counting down the minutes until the ten minute mark had passed. School policy is that if teachers don't show up ten minutes within the start time, you can leave. But soon I heard footsteps and Lucas Roebuck walked in with his red GOP tie and suit on. Again, snowflakes. Nothing could sway my attention. Since everyone showed up to a class where attendance isn't mandatory and on a snowy day of all days, he let us out 45 minutes early.
I then checked my email and my Life of Christ teacher had cancelled class. Also, the offices were closing at 2:30, so that meant I would only be working 1.5 hours. "Yes," I thought. This was the best day of the year.
It's been a while since I've played in the snow. I helped an attempt at making an igloo. I threw snowballs. I sat in the snow and looked at the glory all around me. Thank you God.
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| DISCLAIMER: I am too tired to write correctly. |
[13 Sep 2006|01:54am] |
Again, I am at a point where I want to cry. I'm not sad or gay or anything, but I am immerssed in God and beauty and love and mystery. I want to scream because I have so many thoughts and I wish that everyone could dance with me right now around this burning bush. My life changed when I read a certain line by Wordsworth.
Right now I am reading a friend's paper about "Ode," the poem the line was from. How come our interpretations are nearly identical? This only enhances the experience.
Today in literature, Bill, the prof, said that when we experience poetry we experience life in a different way. Our lives are enhanced by the metaphors in poetry and art. We see things through a diffrent lense. I know this to be true.
Yesterday on OT lit, our prof explained the hebrew words in the creation account. the words for 'formless' and 'empty' when used together in the same context mean 'chaos.' last spring in philosophy, i made a connection between creation and Thales' theory that everything was born out of chaos. This rang a bell, but I wasn't sure why. I never forgot, and yesterday it all came together. These things don't just happen. There is a cosmic organization that is behind all of this.
I also read this quote the other day:
"We are stuck here in time, looking forward and backward for Eden. What we were created to be is lost, though still felt in moments of memory lapse and epiphany. This is art."
This explains me. This is me. This is what I believe, I just haven't been able to put it into words.
I had to write an essay about something I believe for my comp class. So I went with the idea and believing in mysteries.
The idea of Moses and the burning bush would not leave me alone.
To me, a burning bush is the pivitol moment at which you realize something that changes and even shifts the focus of your life. It is epiphany.
Burning bushes are the best moments of my life.
I want to scream and cry and laugh and smash a building with excitement and wonder.
But the thing is, my life is like this so often. Vivid. Ugly things are so beautiful. Black and white pictures are more colorful than anyone knows.
Right now, I am in the same cave Moses was once in. The only light is from the burning bush in front of me. It is enough, and I want nothing more. It beckons me. It says "come closer." Is this God? Yes.
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[11 Sep 2006|01:30am] |
Wow. School is incredible. All of my classes are completely incredible (except for art history, of course) and the people are great. The guys on my floor are amazing and we are seriously like the tightest guys floor on campus. We are like brothers. I feel like I've known them all my life (with a few exceptions, haha).
Today I went to Imago Dei with some friends, which you may remember as the church that Donald Miller goes to. I liked it a lot. The music was great, and the sermon was awesome. They are so art and community orientedm which is right up my alley. And the focus was totally on Jesus and the Bible. It was like a mix of all these different traditions, but yet completely stripped back, like we were all just followers of Jesus.
Oh, and just as a side note, Robin Williams is in Newberg for a few months in rehab! Some girls from the second floor saw him at Fred Meyer the other day. Its awesome.
And I have a friend named Jack who is almost just like Nick from Freaks and Geeks. ♥
I have also been recording a ton and put some new stuff on my myspace. I think i'm going to put out a whole album, because Im just recording my old songs and all that. So i have a ton of material.
Well i just wanted to let you all know what was going on. How are you?
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[04 Sep 2006|09:24am] |
SND ME THNGS PLZ. THNK U.
ND CLL ME 2 (425)248-7728
Carl-Eric Tangen
George Fox University
418 N. Meridian #4823
Newberg, OR 97132-2695
You are all amazing. And so is school. Last night we watched Ali G and got very excited for the Borat movie. And we of course mourned the death of Steve Irwin. So crazy. I didn't think he could actually die!!!!
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| I ♥ George Fox |
[26 Aug 2006|05:54pm] |
So I moved to the bustling town of Newberg, Oregon, yesterday. All I can say is that it is now one of my favorite places ever. I have already made some sweet friends, had a jam session, and generally just fallen in love with the place. I am glad I get to spend the next 4(+/-) years of my life here. All the guys on my floor are completely awesome, and my roommate is pretty cool, too. Not to mention I have a fridge stocked with Coca-Cola, ice cream, and Fruit Punch Gatorade.
Last night I met some of the folks in my freshman seminar class :) and the local Fred Meyer stayed open until 1am just for us Fox students, and there was some free food and free stuff. I got like 16 razors.
Today I put up a bunch of pictures and crap on my wall, and it will be killer when I'm finished.
Tonight is a hoe-down, which should be fun.
Well I will update later, but now I need to go shower because it is so dang hot that I have just been sweating all day and I feel gross.
Love you all!
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| wouldn't you like to be on the cover of a magazine |
[14 Jun 2006|10:55pm] |
so lobe, nick, and sean kidnapped me today.
we went back to lobe's and watched "Invaders From Mars" and "Waiting for Guffman." haha.
and my aunt and uncle and 3 cousins are coming from Norway tomorrow. should be fun.
in other news, my dad is doing a SWEET job right now. he's doing this huge amazing deck for none other than DAVE BAZAN'S IN-LAWS!!!
as a matter of fact, Dave Bazan was at the house today dropping off his daughter becuase he and his wife were going out. CRAZY!!!
And yes, I will be working there this summer. maybe i will meet him. who knows. but apparently these folks already knew that i was in a band?!
anyway, this is exciting!!!
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[14 Jun 2006|12:11am] |
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